Empty Me

Well, as I'm sitting here desperately wanting to go to bed but too wound up to go to sleep because of working on papers, finals, etc...I figured, "why not blog...?" After all, isn't that what most sleep-deprived people are doing these days????

As most of you (or those of you who actually read our blog) know, I've been "in school" for the past two years - attending The Terry College of Business at the University of Georgia - pursuing my MBA in Management. I remember when I got the call (or voicemail) stating I had been accepted....Lori and I were on our way back to Spartanburg from Orangeburg. I was so excited! Mostly because I really didn't think I was going to get in. My GMAT scores had expired and I REALLY did not want to take that exam over...so I had to rely very heavily on my recommendations and work experience. Apparently those were good enough b/c I got in. :-)

Just like every other academic setting, you have your book worms - aka "nerds" (said in the most loving tone by the way) - who will settle for nothing less than an "A" in every class -- most of these people are actually in the full-time program and are able to devote ungodly hours to studying....the slackers, and the in-between-ers...which I would fall in that last group. Working 50+ hours a week, trying to spend time with my family (seeing as how Preston was born right at the end of the first semester, plus wanting to keep my wife so I needed to help out when I could), and also wanting, or should I say NEEDING sleep, I did what I could to "get by"....don't get me wrong, I put in my hours of studying - mostly at the last minute to get my papers finished...like the time I cranked out a 21 page paper the day before it was due....and still pulled out an A...woo hoo - go me!!!

Well, I could go on and on about all the fun I had over the past two years, and perhaps I will do that at some point in time, but for now, let me reign myself back in to what I was originally working on....

Over the past two years, I've found myself really being tested in the faith. I've had to type and delete this next statement a few different times because what I want to say isn't coming out right....so I guess I'll just type it and hope that when people read this they will understand where I'm coming from. I don't know if it is a matter of the more education people receive, the less reliance on God and/or faith they have. I'm not saying this as a universal statement, but more of what I've experienced. It seems as though the "smarter" people become, the more they tend to try and rationalize or look for a specific answer pertaining religious matters. In many of the classes I was in, Christianity was openly mocked (whether by the Professors or by students), and in some cases, it was painful to hear.

Lori and I have been going to the Family Church (http://mysugarhillchurch.com/) for the past 3 years now, and I can honestly say that during that time, I have been challenged - as the Spiritual leader of my home, I know I do not put forth the effort that is needed to truly be the man of God that I should be. Don't get me wrong - I want to. And the fact that I am putting this out for the whole world to see...ok, well, the 3 of you who read this anyway....I guess that's a good first step. I mean, it's so easy for me to just come home, sit back in the recliner, turn on the "we're-back-to-the-80's-team-Braves" game or any other senseless thing on the television instead of opening up the Word and engaging our family in something of worth. Shoot, I'm sitting here typing up this dissertation instead of reading....but I digress...

So, back to our church....I love our church. It's an AWESOME church. One of the biggest "takeaways" has been coming to a full understanding that Christianity isn't about a religion; it's about a relationship.

We've been reading and discussing Colossions, and this past Sunday we were talking about "putting to death" our earthly desires (Col. 3:5). In this book, Paul is talking to believers (NOT non-believers) - telling them (us) that because they (we) have given their (our) lives over to Christ, they (we) are to "put to death" things that pull them (us) away from God - sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires, greed (which is idolatry), anger, rage, malice, slander, filthy language, and lying (Col. 3:5-9). (All this ties together at the end, I promise....)

Take a step back...re-read what I just said...I bet what I was trying to convey didn't actually get conveyed....

Paul is talking to Believers...not non-Believers. He is addressing God's chosen people - those who have ALREADY given their lives over to Christ and professed a faith and love and acceptance of Jesus being the true son of God, born of a virgin, completely free of sin...the One who came to take the pain of our sins away....to DIE for us...man, I mean, is it just me or is that not the most awesome gift in the world?????

What I'm saying is, God loves us for who we are. If we were to wait until we rid ourselves of everything unholy before accepting God's precious gift of salvation, well, to be blunt, we'd never get it....there's not enough time for that.

Anyway, after hearing that sermon, I really felt God speaking to me, and I have such a strong urge to get closer to Him every day. I just pray that I can satisfy that urge by acting upon it. I have the MOST AWESOME, loving, compassionate wife and most adorable son in the world. And I feel we are all very spiritually grounded....but I want to go deeper...and I really feel that this helped. Maybe I'll get back to blogging more frequently.... :-)

So, nearly 2 hours later (and after completing a final and a paper in between starting this post), I just wanted to share the words to what is my "current" favorite song. It's by a former American Idol contestant, Chris Sligh (the dude with the crazy hair from last season), and the song is called "Empty Me" (http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?i=279152559&id=279152526&s=143441).

I really feel that this song says everything I wanted to say....and it is my daily prayer that I can truly ask God to "empty me" so I may "put to death" those things which keep me from getting closer to Him.

(RPR)

Lyrics:

I've had just enough of the spotlight when it burns bright
To see how it gets in the blood.
And I've tasted my share of the sweet life and the wild ride
And found a little is not quite enough.
I know how I can stray
And how fast my heart could change.

Chorus:
Empty me of the selfishness inside
Every vain ambition and the poison of my pride
And any foolish thing my heart holds to
Lord empty me of me so I can be filled with you.

I've seen just enough of the quick buys of the best lies
To know how prodigals can be drawn away.
I know how I can stray
And how fast my heart could change.

(Repeat Chorus)

Cause everything is a lesser thing
Compared to you, compared to you.
Cause everything is a lesser thing
compared to you. So, I surrender all!

Empty me of the selfishness inside
Every vain ambition and the poison of my pride
Empty me of the selfishness inside
Every vain ambition and the poison of my pride
And any foolish thing my heart holds to
Lord empty me of me so I can be
Lord empty me of me so I can be filled with you.

Oh, filled with you. Empty me.